Howdy Kinfolk,

We’ve sent home a first-day Chronicle, posted several hundred photos and a video, and published the headlines of the day on Coleman Town (“And the Pony Express Rides Again.”). Still, I’m sure you are thirsting for a personalized, first-hand account of your child’s first day at camp. I also know that while some campers will eagerly share their activities with play-by-play color commentary, most will answer your specific questions with less-than-detailed off-handedness.

You know how it goes. You say, “How was your day?” and you get back, “Great” or “Fine” or “Okay.” Or, tougher yet, the common response to “What did you do today?” is often “Nothing.” The reality is that they’ve done so much and had so much fun – and also consider Coleman Country their own private world – that they are too tired to provide specifics.

My suggestion is to be armed with two different questions – less obvious queries that will get you the answers you crave:

• What was your favorite activity today?
• What are you looking forward to tomorrow?

Please let me know what you hear (share the responses you get in the Comment Field below)!

One more thing before I sign off – classic line of the day spoken by Explorer Hannah. When asked if she someday might want to be a counselor at Coleman Country, she replied, “I’m going to spend the rest of my life here!”

You see, you get the best information with the right questions!

Until we meet again,

Happy Trails!
Marla

Howdy Kinfolk,

Get Acquainted Day was the official kickoff not only of summer but of the giant photo album that chronicles the action at Coleman Country 2010. As we posted the first several hundred of about 30,000 photos (there are no extra zeros there – not a typo!), it occurred to me that avid Coleman Town visitors might benefit from our thinking,  beyond the colossal collection of photos.

Since they say a picture is worth a thousand words, I’ll start with this cartoon. Read it first, and then we’ll “talk.”

My way of reminding parents that many children don’t want to be interrupted from their activities to pose for a photo! Then again, there are those who are delighted to stop what they’re doing to say “cheese” and who become focused on the camera instead of the activity.  You know your own child, of course, and which category he or she fits into.

Either way, please don’t try to read into why your child might not be photographed on a particular day. And definitely don’t attempt to analyze if that’s her happy smile or if he has enough friends, based on the composition of the photo! Think about all the photos which captured your own less-than-flattering facial expression because you blinked when the shutter snapped or the photographer didn’t frame you and your friends perfectly!

We do our best to convey a representation of the day’s activities; so please try to enjoy the spirit of the day without feeling disappointment if you don’t come across your own camper.

Another point I’d like to make while I have your attention: In today’s society, children are growing up in a world tethered by technology – cell phones, texts, e-mails, and tweets keep the constant connection unbroken. (I’ve heard it called an electronic umbilical cord!)  Yet at camp, we carve out a separate world for kids only. We let you peek in by giving you a one-way window, in essence, through Coleman Town. Please view it as just that and not as a Sherlock Holmes episode!

In fact, consider these life lessons:

• Know that separation is natural and necessary. Each new experience increases a child’s confidence and ability to navigate on his/her own.
• You taught your child well; the lessons that you have instilled in him/her don’t disappear when you are apart.
• Camp is a time for parents to have a break – from homework help, carpools, playdates… the year-round “spinning plates in the air,” so change your own focus and enjoy your time to yourself.
• Camp is also a time for kids to take a break from their parents! They won’t forget you!

So please don’t burden them by asking them to make sure to see the photographer! Rather, sit back each evening (or the following day) and take in the grand view, the big picture of the non-stop fun on The Ranch. And of course when you do come across your own child – a bonus! – pop that picture right into the 2010 photo album that you have created, and watch it grow over the summer, just like your kids will!

Happy Trails!
Marla

Psst… the best advice I’ve heard about motivating positive behavior in children came out of the Palace Theater last night when child and family therapist Bob Ditter spoke with our staff. I just had to share it with you….

Pointing out that it is now well-documented that when adults over-praise children, it backfires and actually results in lower self-esteem and decreased performance (I’ve always referred to this as “self-esteemia”), Bob coached Coleman Country counselors to remember these four key concepts:

• Charity
• Clarity
• Brevity
• Levity

Be gracious, be complimentary, find the good in an action – and share it with your child. Then, be clear about your expectations; don’t leave room for interpretation! Next, be brief in your comment (child development experts tell us that adults talk too much!). And finally, keep it light – because we also know that the second big mistake that grownups make is that we get too emotional.

Great takeaway for our staff, and since we are partners in parenting, I wanted to make sure that you, too, get the benefit of the terrific guidance always provided us by Bob Ditter, our longtime coach who visits before each summer from Boston where he maintains a practice (and who is always available to us by phone throughout the summer).

His advice is very consistent with our philosophy in Coleman Country: this is a place where we value direction, not perfection!

I hope you find this approach as helpful as I do. Meanwhile, until we meet again,

Happy Trails!
Marla

Howdy Kinfolk,

Well, “Camp for a Day,” one of our staff training sessions, just ended, and I find myself thinking of you! More specifically, I am so excited for you, because this is one amazing group of counselors and supervisors whose spirit and passion and expertise are about to influence your children in the most positive ways.

I am reminded of the movie, “Pay it Forward.” Counselors had a ball today, literally and figuratively. And just as play and fun are the vehicles through which we teach life skills to our campers, so did our staff learn so much by playing GaGa, climbing the Challenge Wall, and getting in touch with themselves and their bodies at Yoga.

What I found especially gratifying was the reconstitution of the extended Coleman family, each of whom has been counting down the days until camp. While we have very few new staff members (Ross commented that it’s harder to get a job at Coleman Country this summer than to get into Harvard!), they were welcomed with open arms and integrated into our community. That’s just what will happen in two weeks, when “oldtimer” campers greet “newcomers” and make them feel at home right away!

After a day of coaching that also included techniques for victim-proofing and other skills to help kids “Stand Up,” the activities concluded with Ross’ now-famous game show to test the participants’ knowledge. Laughter abounded as Ross quizzed the contestants, following each right answer with a brain-teaser bonus question that had nothing to do with camp, just common sense.

(So – what was the tallest mountain in the world before Mount Everest was discovered?)

Meanwhile, I wish you could have been here today to get a preview of the incredible energy of the 2010 Coleman Country staff. As they would have said in the Old West, I am bustin’ my britches with pride; and I can’t wait for our campers to be the beneficiaries of the fun and coaching expertise (both on and off the field) that is brimming within each of our raring-to-go staff members.

Until we meet again,

Happy Trails!
Marla

P.S. By the way, Mount Everest has always been the tallest mountain!

Right around this time of year, I find myself thinking about the Leap of Faith, the rigging atop our rock wall in the Grand Playhouse – the platform, 35 feet above the ground, is the departure point from which campers use their self-talk and leave their comfort zones to soar through the air. To me, it is always a very visual symbol of the letting go – and inherent trust – that every parent also needs to summon when they entrust their children to someone else!

It is, after all, a leap of faith for every mom and dad to let go of their child – and rightly so. We encourage you, though, to take a deep breath, just like the kids do; and have confidence in us, knowing that we are there to catch them – both physically and emotionally. If it helps, conjure up a picture in your head of the Leap of Faith, and then picture your child successfully accomplishing their goal.

Remember, children and parents alike need to practice separating from each other so that the kids can build self-confidence and independence skills, and so that the parents can have some needed “me time” to stay emotionally healthy and fulfilled.

June 29^th is just around the corner. I hope you find the opportunity between now and then to let your child know that you believe in him; that you trust her to make good choices when you’re not there to guide her (don’t worry – there are no bad choices in Coleman Country, because it is a community designed for children to practice growing up under the caring coaching of trained counselors!), that he can be comfortable seeking advice from another adult at Coleman Country; and be reassured yourself that camp is a steppingstone to self-reliance – for everyone in the family!

I’ll be checking in regularly with you right here throughout the summer. So, until we meet again,

Happy Trails!
Marla

I am hoping that this blog will become a go-to place for kinfolk (our name for parents here in our little western-style town that suggests we are all part of one big extended family!), a virtual meeting place for us where I can anticipate your questions and concerns and provide some insight into how you can help your child get the most out of the camp experience! And of course, while I’m at it, I am going to try to give you that little extra mother’s perspective.

By the way, I also blog for ACA under the banner of Campfire Stories for Parents, where my generic camp musings can be found on ACA’s resource site for parents, CampParents.org or at MarlaColeman.com.  From time to time, I plan to flag some of those articles for you. Besides giving you the inside scoop on Coleman Country, I know how hard every parent works to do their best at this parenting job, and I believe that sometimes a different lens can provide an “Aha moment.”

I hope we have lots of those moments together this summer.  Please be sure to share your “Aha’s” with me – and also your “Eh’s?” – and I pledge to do the same with you!

So if you have any questions or want to comment or get clarification on something I have or should post, please e-mail me at  blog@ColemanCountry.com. I’d love to hear from you!

Until we meet again (right here on this site!),

Happy Trails!
Marla